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GTA C-arnage

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Posts posted by GTA C-arnage

  1. I dont know any jokes but I do know some Yo Momma jokes

    Yo Momma so ugly , she went into a haunted house and came out with an application

    :lol: *laughs*

    Yo Momma so fat , the last time she saw 90210 was on a weight scale

    hehehe...

  2. Im not sure either :D

    But put it this way , what if someone had to do a report on VC (what kinda teacher would give such homework?) and they need some background on a certain character , so lucky for them I posted it ;)

  3. Here are The Characters that you've either seen or heard on Vice City and some info about them

    Here they Are :

    Alex Shrub

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Average

    -Facts:

    - Extreme Right Wing congressman.

    - Happily married.

    - Known philanderer.

    - Will do anything for votes.

    - Power obsessed. Usual politician.

    - Expected to go very far.

    - Cross dresser

    Auntie Poulet

    -Voice: Miss Cleo, actual name: Youree Cleomill Harris

    Avery Carrington

    -Voice: Burt Reynolds

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Average

    -Facts:

    - Texan property magnate and real estate developer.

    - Likes to talk about his father. The good ol' days.

    - Extreme Capitalist.

    - Suspected of doing anything to manipulate property prices and

    land value, including, but not limited to, arson, rioting,

    bribery, intimidation, murder.

    - Always wears a cowboy hat.

    - Believed to be involved in several developments and slum-

    clearance programs.

    - Known guest of Cortez.

    - Uses Ken Rosenberg for legal advice - possibly weak link?

    - Hair suspected to be fake.

    Buddy

    BJ Jone's Loan Shark

    -Voice: Lawrence Taylor

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Big/Muscular

    -Facts: - Former star Tight End for the Vice City Mambas.

    - Very successful career in pro football, but haunted

    problems off the field.

    - Famous for hunting opponents. Now runs a celebrity

    endorsed used car lot, which is believed to be a front.

    - Thought to sell stolen vehicles.

    - Believed to be heavily in debt with loan sharks and is now

    doing anything for money.

    Cam Jones

    -Facts: -Claims to be an expert safe cracker

    -Confirmed kleptomaniac

    -Believed to be working with Cassidy

    Candy Suxx

    -Voice: Jenna Jameson

    -Facts: -Woman of extremely ill repute.

    -Possible involvement in blackmailing politicians

    -Never seems to get cold.

    Capo

    Colonel Cortez

    -Build: Average

    -Gender: Male

    -Facts: - Cultural Attache.

    - Has diplomatic immunity - bear this in mind when bugging

    his house.

    - Has somehow survived up to 30 coups in his native country.

    - Likes to eat endangered species. Considers this to be

    fine living.

    - Lives with his daughter. Widower.

    - Long term dislike for French secret service.

    - Believed to facilitate trade with all areas of criminal

    activity, including, but not limited to, narcotics,

    firearms, weapons, and military secrets.

    - In own county, has been sentenced to death 9 times, but

    always survives and gets promoted.

    Eugene

    -Facts: -Possible way to Leo Teal.

    - Leo Teal's other lover.

    - Interior designer and restaurant owner.

    - Likes knives.

    - Likes Thailand.

    - Likes the beach.

    Georgio Forelli

    -Facts: -Italian-American criminal.

    -Current case is going to trial, thought to be certain.

    -Related to Liberty City organized crime family.

    -Cross dresser.

    Gonzales

    -Build: Heavy/Stocky

    -Gender: Male

    -Facts: - Works for Colonel Juan Garcia Cortez in various

    capacities.

    - Diplomatic immunity - part if cultural affairs division of

    San Dominican consulate, where Cortez in Cultural Attache.

    Believed Gonzales' visa what issued as Health and Fitness

    Commission.

    - Greedy - known to take bribes; could try bribing to find

    out more about Cortez' operation.

    - Has been seen leaving property of Diaz without Cortez.

    Possible weakness in organization.

    - More information needed on Cortez. Gonzales has problems

    with his weight.

    - Formerly very active in Vice City under world. Now spends

    a lot of time in his penthouse, away from Cortez.

    Hilary King

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Heavy

    -Facts: - Expert driver believed to have worked with Cam Jones and

    Phil Cassidy.

    - Neurotic.

    - Compulsive eater.

    - Psychological profiling reveals obsession with abandonment

    issues.

    - Ginger.

    - Hilary King comes from a stable family background.

    Ice Cream Lady

    -Facts: - Psychiotic distributor of soft ice cream.

    - Business known to be a front.

    - We are as yet unable to determine what it is fronting.

    - Maude Hanson runs company.

    - Believed to be a sociopath who once ran a children's home.

    - The ice-cream lady sells Ice-cream sprinkled in drugs or

    something

    Jack Howitzer

    Ken Roseburg

    -Voice: David Paymer

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Small/Weak

    -Facts: - Partner at Rosenberg & Associates legal firm.

    - Suspected problem with narcotics and egomania.

    - Believed to be developing contacts with Liberty City mob.

    - Suspected of cheating in Law school exams.

    - Believed to have employed heavies on numerous occasions to

    intimidate and corrupt juries.

    - Very poor success rate in trials.

    - "Blue Chip" clients include Georgio Forreli. Cousin of

    Liberty City crime boss, Sonny.

    - Always desperate for money.

    Lance Vance

    -Voice: Phillip Michael Tomas

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Muscular

    -Facts: - Works with you in Vice City.

    - Recently arrived in town with his brother.

    - Asks a lot of questions.

    - Trained helicopter pilot.

    - Believed to be in narcotics trade.

    - Heard mouthing off in a lot of nightclubs.

    - Believed to get aggressive or needy when he drinks.

    - Possibly emotionally insecure.

    Love Fist

    Paul from Kent

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Small

    -Facts: - "Kent Paul" is believed to be an assumed name. Real name

    unknown.

    - Also known as "KP", "Paulo" and "Kent".

    - English Youth.

    - Claims to work in music business. No known employment.

    - Claims to be a criminal mastermind.

    - No criminal record found yet.

    - Known to have made contact with biker gangs, but believed

    to have fallen out with Biker's gang.

    - Pathological liar.

    - Nasty clothes.

    - Suspected narcotics addiction.

    - Seems to have contacts in certain SWAT divisions.

    Pastor Richards

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Average

    -Facts: - Possible Polygamist.

    - Hates people who help others.

    - Fervent anti-communist.

    - Obsessed with nuclear winter.

    - Hateful human being, but menace to society uncertain at

    present.

    - Maniac firebrand preacher, obsessed with money.

    - Has written several awful books. All completely

    fabricated. Most given away.

    - Obsessed with degenerates.

    - Has been campaigning to build a large statue in his own

    image.

    - Has been attempting to bribe officials at NASA for rocky

    technology.

    - Believed to be embezzling money from the fund for a

    private mansion in Hawaii.

    Leo Teal

    -Facts: - Possible connection with Mr. Black.

    - Very complicated personal life.

    - Works in restaurant business.

    - Communications expert.

    - Haven't been able to get a working tap on his phones.

    - Believed to be working as a hitman in Vice City.

    - Possible involvement in narcotics trade.

    Mercedes Cortez

    -Voice: Fairuza Balk

    -Facts: - Daughter of Colonel Cortez.

    - Likes to party.

    "Big" Mitch Baker

    -Voice: Lee Majors

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Tall

    -Facts:

    - Vietnam veteran, turned motorbike enthusiast. Won Purple Heart

    for killing a village full of Vietcong and being injured.

    Extreme bitterness at trement of veterans has led to violent

    clashes with authority.

    - Jailed on 13 occasions.

    - Lawless degenerate sociopath.

    - Loves bar sports, fighting, pinball, pool, eating live animals,

    hard rock music, wrestling, racing motorbikes, urinating in

    public places, scaring police.

    - Believed to have implicated in several civil disturbances.

    - Runs local gang of bikers. Believed to be implicated in

    Narcotics distribution.

    - Extreme loyalty within gang.

    - Initiation rituals preclude getting man on inside.

    - Known loathing for soft rock, communists, and wigs.

    Moweesha

    -Facts: - Involved in dubious practice with Teal and several other

    men.

    - Thought to be paid company.

    - Involved in bizarre practices with Leo Teal and a manatee.

    Mr. Black

    -Facts: - Nothing is known about this man.

    - Eager to find out more.

    - Believed to be involved in running hitman business.

    - No further info.

    Pedro Garcia

    -Facts: - Involved in violent gun-running.

    - Buying weapons from out of state and selling them on the

    streets.

    - Believed to be a rival of Phil Cassidy.

    Phil Cassidy

    -Voice: Gary Busey

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Average

    -Facts: - Linked to "Cam" Jones. Jones and Cassidy believed to have

    worked together numerous times although Cassidy has avoided

    conviction.

    - Degenerate.

    - Patriot.

    - Cassidy claims to have served in various divisions although

    Army records show he was repeatedly rejected for service

    because of drunkenness and an unsuitable temperament for

    combat.

    - Redneck arms dealer.

    - Believed to be involved in weapons trade.

    - Gun enthusiast. Member in various second amendment

    organizations and various Vice City gun clubs.

    - Sources suggest he also distills boomshine in own stills.

    - Fighting war with Mexican gun-running gangs.

    - Phil Cassidy shot his arm off some how. You also said that

    he went to his personal physician. He actually went to an

    old army surgeon and he was going to blow something up

    because he was drunk on boomshine, but the batteries were

    dead and he had some on what he was going to blow up. When

    he replaced the batteries he accidentally pulled the

    trigger and blew his arm off. The mission was "Boomshine

    Saigon"

    Ricardo Diaz

    -Voice: Luis Guzman

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Heavy/Stocky

    -Facts: - Extremely dangerous.

    - Bribed INS for Green Card in 1978. Entered the country

    from Columbia.

    - Contacts in Columbia believe he is a major player in

    narcotics industry and anti-government activity.

    - Extremely popular philanthropist. Gives various Ricardo

    Diaz foundations across Vice City and Central and South

    America. All are believe to be a front.

    - Extremely short and is believed to suffer from Napoleon

    complex.

    - Medical records show he has over-active glands and sweats

    more than is socially acceptable.

    - Gun collector. Always armed.

    - Has private army/militia and is heavily guarded at all

    times.

    - Has been involved in long running battle for control of

    narcotics business in Vice City.

    - Known to have bribed police and officials within the town.

    - Feared due to reputation for unpredictable behavior.

    - Thought to be responsible for 18 murders.

    Sonny Forelli

    -Voice: Tom Sizemore

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Average

    -Facts: - Head of the Forreli crime family.

    - Major crime family in Liberty City.

    - Believed to have major influence in racketeering,

    gambling, union trouble, corruption and prostitution.

    - Came to power young.

    - Thought to have ordered several mob killings, including

    Harewood incident.

    - Only minor charges have ever struck. Thought to be

    interested in entering narcotics trade, traditionally a no

    go area for Liberty City mob.

    -Phone records reveal calls to home address of Ken

    Rosenberg.

    - Notoriously poor taste in clothes.

    Steve Scott

    -Voice: Dennis Hopper

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Average

    -Facts: A film director with an unnatural obsession with sharks and

    mountains of mashed potatoes, Steve Scott has been spotted at various

    parties with organized crime. Rumors say he's seeking any money he can

    get to finance his next big film.

    Tommy Vercetti

    -Voice: Ray Liotta

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Average

    -Facts:

    -Tommy is the main character who you play as.

    - Works for Sonny Forreli.

    - Worked in Liberty City after long stretch in maximum security.

    - Understandably nervous about a reappearance in Liberty City so

    a trip down south seemed like a good idea.

    - Tommy is left in Vice City with no money or merchandise.

    - Tommy wants his money back but Cuban gangsters, biker gangs,

    and corrupt politicians stand in his way.

    - Most of Vice City seems to want Tommy dead.

    - His only solution is to fight back and take over the city

    himself.

    Umberto Robina

    -Voice: Danny Trejo

    -Gender: Male

    -Build: Heavy

    -Facts: - Cuban warlord.

    - Long term feud with Haitian criminals. Wants control turf.

    - Extreme macho man.

    - Wants to wage full scale war with Haitians.

    - Never implicated in a crime personally.

    - Bravery has been questioned with Cuban circles.

  4. Hey Jaruff , Id like to join The Gambino Crime Family

    Honestly, Ive only been here for about 2 week and my post count is low due to a lot of school work :wacko:

    Id like to be an Underboss but since my post count is low I dont mind being a Capo-that leads street division

    I promise to be a loyal and a Useful member :D

    Hope my Resume Helps ;)

    LayTA!

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