Kitsune Inferno Posted October 7, 2006 Share Posted October 7, 2006 (edited) If I were to ever have an interview with Jack Thompson, I think it would probably end up like this... Me: You all know this guy. Jack Thompson...the Miami lawyer who's hellbent on banning violent video games. And he thinks he'll do it by ANY MEANS NECESSARY. He's also has a stiffy for banning rap music. Let's see what this retarded bitch has to say. JT: Hey, kid! You need to watch your mouth! Me: And you need to staple yourself in the nuts everytime you open your mouth. First up, rap music. What the hell is your problem with one of the country's most popular genres? JT: Well, they invoke violence against police officers and women to start off. Me: Well, if that statement is at all intelligent. Violence against women and cops have been around since WAY before rap music. Remember the mob way back in the 1920's? Rap didn't come until the 70's, you dee dee dee. This part is over for now. I need to think of more material. JT: Rap music is EVIL! Me: And so is the woman who decided to have your kid. Part 2: Edited October 7, 2006 by TEC 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tommy vercetti guy Posted October 7, 2006 Share Posted October 7, 2006 "And so is the woman who decided to have your kid" ROFLCOPTER!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K_P Posted October 7, 2006 Share Posted October 7, 2006 Lol, that part was jokes. How come there is no part 2? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artur Posted October 7, 2006 Share Posted October 7, 2006 That's funny! Give him time, he'll come up with something in a couple days I think... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nate10 Posted October 7, 2006 Share Posted October 7, 2006 Ya.That was pretty funny,I think.But ya,let's get the part 2 soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Inferno Posted October 9, 2006 Author Share Posted October 9, 2006 Y'all want Part 2? You can't handle part two! Me: We're back with this exclusive interview with one of the most famous ass from Miami! I'm not gonna designate this whinner's name. Jack Thompson: Uppity little brat... Me: What was that? Nevermind, I have connections to some vicious ricers. Now, what's your take on this recent surge in school shootings? JT: Video... Me: Stop right there. I know what you're gonna say. *in whinny voice* "Well, we all know that the Columbine Masscre, for example, was caused by games like Doom, Quake, and Suck Jack Thompson's Tit." Shut up. Millions of people play those games, except for that last one, and millions of kids don't stockpile guns and shoot up their school. Those Columbine kids were deeply troubled, had easy access to guns, stashed them in their room (while the parents "claim" they knew nothing about), and made videos of them target practicing! Now, how about the time you said that the Sims charcter's were "anotomically correct" under those blurs? JT: Well, they must have modded the game before I could prove it. Me: Or your claim was full of 200-grade horseshit. I'm very sorry Maxis, I'm a big fan of your work, but these guys wouldn't know what real ass and titties were if it came up and smacked them in their faces. And about that modding thing, you mean something like "Hot Coffee"? JT: Maybe. Me: Well, guess what. NOBODY COULD ACCESS THAT FEATURE WITHOUT A FORBIDDEN MOD OR A 30 DOLLAR CHEATING DEVICE. You're probably just jealous because Mrs. Johnson won't take it from behind anymore. Oh, she will. Just not from you. 27th best time of my life. What about the time you proposed a video game idea which included killing major video game CEOs and the like? Then some guys did the idea; you wouldn't pay them so the good folks at Penny Arcade paid them (with their own money) and using your name, and you tried to get them arrested? JT: It just wasn't right. Me: How wasn't it right? I mean, they did use they're own cash. JT: Uhhh... Me: What's that sound? Oh, it's the sound of you shutting the f*** up! PA: Jack Thompson, please come to the lobby. Some angry-looking dudes with flashy tuners are waiting for you. Me: Wow, they came that quick? Well, you heard the lady! MOVE!!! *MINUTES LATER* Yeah, tie him to the lightpole. Ok, that's good. Gimmie the tire iron. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artur Posted October 9, 2006 Share Posted October 9, 2006 (edited) Haha that's some good stuff. Some good jokes you got there, maybe someday you'll have this interview and video game fans all over the world will be happy. Gimme the tire iron... that's funny! You should make a Part 3 if Jack Thompson made it out alive after that "accident"... Edited October 9, 2006 by ArturKim21 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Lord Posted October 9, 2006 Share Posted October 9, 2006 Nice one But who exactly is Jack Thompson. Heard his name but dunno who he is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Inferno Posted October 9, 2006 Author Share Posted October 9, 2006 (edited) Jack Thompson is some lawyer who's made himself famous by pissing off every single gamer by speaking out against M-rated games and even trying to get them off shelves. And by the way, Part 3 Me: We're back with the, hopefully last, segment of my interview with Jack Thompson. JT, what do you have to say about the time you tried to get 25 to Life off store shelves not becuase it was utter crap, but only because it included murders of cops? You got to play AS a COP, diphead! JT: *bloody and sobbing* I'm sorry. I was in the wrong! Me: That's right, bitch. Good...now how are your thoughts on video games in general? JT: They're the best thing to happen to mankind since...HELP ME!!! THIS ASSHOLE BEAT ME HALF TO DEATH WITH A TIRE IRON AND SODOMI.... Me: That's it. You won't be telling anybody anything, now. Tony, the .22. JT: EVILLLLLL!!!! Edited October 9, 2006 by TEC 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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