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GTA vs Real-life


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Having sex with a hooker

GTA- Tell her to get in the car and car shakes a little, but nothing is happening, no fear of aids

Real Life- You hump her, and get a blowjob, get aids probably

Getting a car repainted

GTA- drive into a shop and they paint it in 4 seconds, cost $100, and if your car is undamaged, theyll paint it for free

real life- Bring it to the shop and it takes probably 2 days to finish, cost $550 the least

car alarms

GTA- Wait a minute intill it stops and then you can get in the car

real life- The car alarm keeps working intill you pull out the wires, car batter dies or the car owner turns off the alarm

getting on fire

GTA- Wait 5 seconds and it'll burn out in a few seconds

real life- keeps burning for a long time, you'll probably be dead

getting arrested

GTA- stay in jail for a long time

real life- bribe the cops with $100 and youre off

firing a minigun

GTA- You can fire it in a perfect line, no problems whatsoever

real life- you cant even hold it up properly and if you fire it, you would fall back

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car wrecks

gta-car wreck into another car with not much damage done guy gets out of car and tries to beet the crap outta you

rl- one collision and you have insurance problems and probly a new car and a eterny

car explosions

gta- car goes on fire after wrecking into 20 other cars and explodes 5 seconds later

rl-your car is totaled after just one collision

train wrecks

gta- after going to fast locomotive detaches from cars and slides off track taking you with it............bumps into any building it hits and nothing happens it just stops sliding:rofl2:

rl- massive destruction train completely demolishes anything it meets

and will probly blow up :rofl2:

train wrecking into a car

gta-train just pushes car and you out of the way

rl-train just destroys the car and probly you too

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GTA: Kill and sometimes don't get introuble

Life: Kill, an investigation is involved.

GTA: Money cheat.

Life: Work and pay off debts.

GTA: Crash a car, no problem

Life: Possibly get sued.

GTA: Die, come back to life.

Life: Die, your fukin screwed. :yup:

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Yellow Lights

GTA- People stop like it was a red light

Real- People go as fast as they can

Shooting people's heads

GTA- The head disapears and they die

Real- They die with their head still on

Jumping on top of people's cars

GTA- You can stay as long as you want and they don't care, even the cops don't care

Real- They'll probably stop and freak out

Airplanes

GTA- You can nosedive into the water and just get out of the plane and be fine

Real- You're dead

Police car with siren on

GTA- Cars swerve off the road and usually crash

Real- People slow down or stop

Gas stations

GTA- You punch the pump a few times and it blows up and kills you

Real- You punch it and people give you wierd looks

Deserts

GTA- There are roads in the desert and the desert is surrounded by water

Real- No roads or water

Fast Food

GTA- Salads cost 10 dollars, and if you try to rob the pizza place, the cashier will pull out a shotgun and chase you

Real- Salads cost 2 or 3 dollars and they don't have shotguns

Getting shot

GTA- you get shot 20 times before you die, and you can still walk and run after you get shot, and to heal your bullet wounds, just go eat some food.

Real- you get shot once, and you are seriously injured or dead

Driving

GTA- People honk all the time

Real- People rarely honk

Car crashes

GTA- You both either beat each other up or you just keep driving

Real- If it's minor, you exchange insurence and phone numbers, if it's big, traffic is blocked for hours and there are police cars and ambulances all around the wreck.

Parking cars

GTA- Steal 5 cars, park them all next to each other, drive far enough so you can't see them, and come back, and they're all gone.

Real- When you come back, the police are waiting for you.

Talking in cars

GTA- You can hear them even when you're both in seperate cars

Real- You can only hear if you have your windows open, you're right next to each other, and you're yelling.

Buying cars and houses

GTA- You buy cars at docks and they cost more than houses

Real- Houses cost 5 times more than cars, and you buy cars at dealerships

Stealing jetpacks

GTA- You steal a top secret million dollar jetpack, and you can fly it around all you want, even in front of the police, and you don't get in trouble

Real- You steal it, and all the police in the world are after you and if you fly it, they'll immediately chase you.

Money

GTA- Your friend gives you 500 dollars and says go get yourself a beer

Real- If you're lucky, you get 10 dollars for a beer

Flowers

GTA- You find flowers just floating in random places, and you can kill people by beating them with the flowers.

Real- You buy flowers in a flower store and you give them to people as a gift.

Vilagante Mode

GTA- You get a wanted level for stopping a criminal.

Real- You get backup.

Mod shops

GTA- By painting your car a different color, it is automatically repaired. And you can't paint it orange.

Real- Your car isn't repaired, and if it's all wrecked, they probably won't even paint it. And you can paint it orange.

Also something funny I noticed in the mod shops is if you try to paint your car the color it already is, they say "You're car is already that color" but that acually means "You are car is already that color."

Taxis

GTA- If you crash or flip over, the only thing that happens is you get a smaller tip.

Real- They'll probably scream for help and tell you to stop.

Old ladies

GTA- They usually drive tractors or SUVs, and sometimes they will attack you with a shovel or golf club or something if you crash into them. They're also all fat.

Real- They usually drive little cars, and will probably have a heart attack if you crash into them.

Garage Doors

GTA- They won't open if there are too many cars in the garage.

Real- They open as long as you push the button.

Motorcycles

GTA- Slam into a cement truck head on going 80 mph and just fall off and lose little health

Real- Very seriously injured, or probably dead.

Water

GTA- Other than CJ, people instantly die when they touch the water.

Real- Most people can swim, or at least float for a while.

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