I have a cone every night. 
I can down a bottle of Bunderberg Rum in 10 minutes and then I'm fucked. 
I got laid at 14.. Surprisingly I get judged alot for this. 
I'm addicted to RATM. 
I made a mix tape of my own rap songs. 
I'm too patriotic. 
I have a pitbull  
I have a criminal record. 
I lost the top part of my left pinkey finger in a drop saw accident. 
I saw my best mate die in a car accident. I was in the passenger seat, he was driving. 
I have a fear of being hit on the bridge of my nose. 
I have a tried cocaine..speed..LSD. 
I had sex with a ex girlfriends twin sister to get revenge. 
"I've masturbated 9,567,492,93 times and I have no plans of stopping." 
Great words from the one and only Homer Simpson