WRX22B1998 Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 Things You Don't Want to Hear During Surgery Oops! Has anyone seen my watch? That was some party last night. I can't remember when I've been that drunk. Damn! Page 47 of the manual is missing! Well this book doesn't say that... What edition is your manual? OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature. Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy. Come back with that! Bad Dog! Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that? Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie If I can just remember how they did this on ER last week. Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before? Damn, there go the lights again... Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy's got two of 'em. Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens! Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off. I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses. Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us. Steril, shcmeril. The floor's clean, right? What do you mean he wasn't in for a sex change! What do you mean, he's not insured? This patient has already had some kids, am I correct? Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card? Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough. What do you mean "You want a divorce"! I don't know what it is, but hurry up and pack it in ice. Let's hurry, I don't want to miss "Bay Watch" That laughing gas stuff is pretty cool. Can I have some more of that? Hey Charlie, unzip the bag on that one, he's still moving. Did the doctor know he would look like that afterwards? Of course I've performed this operation before, Nurse! FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tilly Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 You still have the coolest name ever... "Doctor... Doctor stopit! Whats gotten into you today!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NotYouHaha Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 (edited) - Is this a test? - These knives are filthy! - Hey Doctor, Am I doing this right? - Why don't YOU try to do this right? - HELP! - Go, go, go! - Hurry up! - Can I take a shot at it? - I Can't __________________! Edited May 8, 2008 by NotYouHaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tilly Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 "Guys, I don't think you understand how baked I am right now..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WRX22B1998 Posted May 8, 2008 Author Share Posted May 8, 2008 lmao these things are funny as... especially "Come back with that! Bad Dog! " imagine hearing that...then..."damit that was our last transplant kidney" and u see this dog run out of the hospital. hehehe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
azn Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 (edited) -Hey wasn't this the knife I was using to cut those potatoes for my dinner last night? -Where are my scissors? -Is there meant to be that much blood? -Am I qualified for this? -Nurse could you cut that off? -Oops I forgot the painkillers.. -Err..I have the casing for the knife but where's the blade gone? -What? I wasn't meant to cut off the happy sack? Oh boy.. -There's a 0% of survival?! Fine, just tell him later everything will be all right.. -What do you mean we were meant to operate on a dog and not a human? -Where's all this red wine coming from? -Nasty.. -So he won't survive? Then stop wasting my time! -Here's our chance to experiment! -Embrace yourselves! -..My manual says printed 1928... -Could we watch TV while doing whatever it is we're doing? -Since when did this become a surgery? Weren't we trying new experiments? -WHERE'S THE PAGE ABOUT EXTREME BLOOD LOSS? -What do you mean we operated on the wrong person? Edited May 8, 2008 by Rainbow Six Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crypt Posted May 8, 2008 Share Posted May 8, 2008 Good thing i watched that alien operation movie, it sure did had this part...did it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tilly Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 "He'll definitely need a respirator after this one." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mutu Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 -Hey wasn't this the knife I was using to cut those potatoes for my dinner last night?-What do you mean we operated on the wrong person? ROFL! I would love to meet this doctor, lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cross Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 sorry if some are on the list cause i didnt read the WHOLE list - was this a man or a woman before the operation? -so this was'nt the dead body for the donation? - i this his arm or his leg? -(after a joke) HAHAHAHAHAH.... woops!... ... ... this NEVER happened!! -uuuh i like think that.. uuuh.. you need to cut this uuhhhh.. whatever out and put it in the oven for uuhh.. some time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connor Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 "Why does this man have an erection?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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